Chard, the thing that makes you say Mmmm (really!)

daphne on March 4, 2009

I am shocked. I had been wracking my brain trying desperately to write something garden-y amid late winter doldrums that would somehow resonate, and Bam! I hit the health-food jackpot. The outpouring in support of chard, sleeper vegetable of the year, has been overwhelming.

Here I was bravely choking down the stuff in the name of health when there are hundreds upon thousands of chard fanatics with a deep understanding of this under-appreciated vegetable.  You already knew why to serve it.  You even know how to grow it.  But more to the point, you really know how it should be eaten.  Hint: it can be crunchy!

Ok, crunchy chard. I am intrigued…go on. Where will this wacky nutritious hero pop up next?

Funny I should ask myself, because I happen to have an answer.  With summer just around the corner (and down the street and around the bend) thoughts turn to carnivals (work with me here.)  Blue skies, balloons, and loads of good clean American deep-fried fun.  Wait, hear me out.  I’m not suggesting you call it quits and break out the fryer, I’m simple setting the scene for our new crunchy, healthy friend….

Speaking of friends, my friend Annie is incredible.  Awesome, amazing Annie. She’s a magician who miraculously took our bitter, vitamin-packed pal and presto! change-o! Turned it into a crispy, carnival-worthy, snickity old snack.

And here, for the first time in North America, Annie has willingly revealed her secret for changing a nutrient packed yuck into a nutrient-packed yum.

Now I’m not going to lie to you. This recipe works best if you’ve got a top hat and a long black cape lined in purple satin.  Of course you can try it wearing jeans and a t-shirt.  Results may vary.

(Worried about me?  Think I’m showing just a bit too much enthusiasm for chard? Perhaps, but it has been a long winter.  And all I’m asking is that you try it first. Then come on back and judge me.)

1.    Wash the chard.
2.    Slice and remove the stalks. Set aside for salads or other recipe.
3.    Slice the leaves in half or quarters. Set aside to dry.

You’ll need a light dressing.  Mine was a simple vinaigrette, but anything will do; whatever you’ve got got in the house or throw together some of your favorite flavors.  I made a tray plain for the girls, with just a little oil and salt.

Mix together the dressing:
•    ½ cup Olive oil
•    ¼ cup Balsamic vinegar
•    1-2 Tbsp Mustard
•    2-3 Tbsp crushed garlic
•    Salt and pepper to taste.

1.    Toss the chard leaves in the dressing. Make sure to coat the leaves but they should not be drenched.
2.    Lay the chard flat on a greased baking sheet.
3.    Sprinkle with a little salt.

Bake for 7-8 minutes in 375° oven.  Watch closely so leaves crisp but don’t char.

Your guests, even your children, will be amazed!

Annie’s Magical Chard Chips

daphne on March 4, 2009

My daughter actually said this last night:

Mom, can I eat the chard now, or do I have to wait for dinner?

I kid you not, this is good stuff.  Even I’ve been eating my greens lately; it’s that good.

Ingredients: Olive oil, chard, salt

Wash chard, and blot – leave it a little bit damp.
Slice and remove the stalks. Set aside for salads or other recipe.
Slice the leaves in half or quarters.

Drizzle oil on a baking sheet, and arrange the chard in a single layer.

Sprinkle with salt.

Bake for 7-8 minutes in 400° oven.

Watch closely so leaves crisp but don’t char.  Eat as is or dip in your favorite dressing.

Sugar Cube Igloo with Frosting, *recipe not included

daphne on February 27, 2009

Kira threw a major hissy fit yesterday.  Maybe it was the culminating pressure of being home sick for a week.  Or it could have been the stress of listening to me harp about the post-concussion care list over and over again.  Whatever it was, she snapped.  Here’s what happened:

I got an email from her teacher, requesting that I send a box of sugar cubes and a tub of frosting to school. The kids, she wrote, would be creating igloos to further their study of Alaska.  Kira was delighted as she watched me shove the construction materials into her backpack.

She danced and sang, “We build them. Then we eat them.”

“No,” laughed I.  “You will not be eating them.”

Note that in the above sentence I was using the royal, plural YOU, as in “there is no way the teacher is going to watch YOU–27 eight year-olds–devour handfuls of sugar dipped in frosting and then sit YOU down to a lesson in subtraction.”

This is what Kira heard: “The lucky children of your class will gleefully participate in the ancient Alaskan igloo-eating ritual, but not you my little pretty.  No, not you. Ha-ha-ha. You will be sitting in the corner with a basket of chard and a sign that reads: I am the class goober.  Life is totally unfair.”

Now clearly I have made my case for wanting the children to eat healthy foods.  But contrary to what Kira may want you to believe, I am not an organically-obsessed ogre intent on wringing every last ounce of joy from their childhood.  I follow every healthy vegetable-laden dinner with an equally healthy ice cream sundae (or cookie or slice of pie or leftover piece of Halloween candy.)  Balance, you see, is key.

A recent article in the NY Times floats the idea that an intent focus on teaching kids about healthy foods could send them over the dietary edge.  A kid obsessed with fat, they insinuate, is no different from a kid obsessed with pesticides or vitamins or omega 3 fatty acids.  A kid obsessed, they feel, is a kid in an unhealthy relationship with food.

Forget for a moment that I am on the record in support of obsessions.  Am I “driving (my) kids absolutely crazy,” as Katie Wilson, president of the School Nutrition Association would apparently claim?   Kira probably would concur, but I’m not 100% ready to toss in the tomatoes.  Still, in the interest of appearing open-minded, I’ll concede that she has a point worth considering.

So here is what I am going to do while I let these new thoughts-on-food germinate against my open mind…

I’ll simply feed the kids one sugar frosting igloo for breakfast, and another sugar frosting igloo for lunch.  Then, I’ll follow them up with a healthy, well-balanced dinner.  Moderation, after all, is key.

PS–Hey, today is my birthday. And here is my birthday song:

Happy Birthday to me
I don’t want broccoli
Or anything that’s healthy
Just some chocolate cake for me!

Pretty please with chard on top

daphne on February 23, 2009

Rainbow chard is the prima donna of the produce aisle. Just take a look at this princess of a vegetable–

You should see its colors pop against the other dull greens stacked in the produce aisle.  Here, in the middle of February, when everything else seems shades of tan, the chard looks exotic.  It’s no wonder the children clamor for nibble. But children have to learn that throwing a temper tantrum and begging is simply not appropriate grocery store behavior.  No matter how much they want that veggie.

Of course I jest.  If my kids express even the most remote interest in a food that falls into a green category, I’m all for it.  So when I left it up to them to choose a veggie for the night, they were drawn to the amazing technicolor dream-chard.  No contest. How could boring broccoli even hope to hold a candle to such a dazzling veggie?

I thought it at best a begrudging choice, but then something incredible happened.  We were tucking into our Friday night movie and popcorn when Acadia spoke. Five years and counting and I still never know what may come out of that child’s mouth.

I don’t want any popcorn.  Can I have some chard instead? The purple leaf, please?

I kid you not.  The child asked for a leafy snack.  And said please.

Acadia’s movie treat aside, chard is a tough chew.  It looks a little like spinach, but the leaves are thicker, waxier and denser.  Still, there are ways to get the whole family to eat it, and receive a heaping dose of the good stuff in the process.  But chard is more than just a pretty face; it’s jam packed with good stuff.

Swiss chard is good for your lungs, bones and heart.  It’s a notorious cancer fighter.  It’s loaded with fiber, and vitamin K, vitamin A, vitamin C, magnesium, manganese, potassium, iron, and vitamin E.   And copper, calcium, vitamin B2, vitamin B6, protein, phosphorus, vitamin B1, zinc, folate, biotin, niacin and pantothenic acid.

Not familiar with that last one? Lucky you have me, and lucky me, I have wikipedia.  Pantothenic acid is another name for vitamin B5, a water-soluble vitamin required to sustain life. Sustaining life is good.

And I thought the biggest triumph of the Swiss was Toblerone chocolate.  Mmm, Toblerone.  So so good.  But I digress…

On a return trip to the store this weekend I giddily pointed out the chard,  and graciously offered to buy more for my young connoisseur.

Uh, no thanks mom.  I don’t need any.

Oh, well.  It was a good thing while it lasted.


Swiss Chard, For the Family

daphne on February 23, 2009

It’s a super-veggie, packed with loads of vitamins, antioxidants, and a huge list of good stuff that the whole family can enjoy.  Or at least tolerate.  Or at very least you can distract them by talking about the wondrous array of fairy-land colors.  Or something.

Here’s how I get my kids to eat chard:

I cut up the leaves and the stalks, both parts are edible and worthy, and mix it into the girls’ salads.

They may moan a little, but sell it like a game: who can find all the gorgeous jewels, and make them disappear first? Tell them it’s the favorite food of princesses and fairies, or dragons and trains.  Whatever it takes, you know.

And here’s how the grown-ups eat their chard:

Chop the leaves, dice the stalks and saute away in about a tablespoon of extra virgin olive oil, diced onions and chopped garlic.  Then hide it, like I do in this lasagna.

No-mush lasagna

daphne on February 22, 2009

Though I am an enormous fan of cheese, I never liked the goopy cheesy layers of traditional lasagna, so I made up my own version.

  • 12-14 lasagna noodles
  • 1 large tomato, sliced thin
  • fresh spinach, sliced into bite-sized pieces
  • swiss chard, cut small and sauteed in olive oil, diced onions and garlic
  • tomato sauce
  • Parmesan cheese
  • mozzarella, shredded or sliced
  • mushrooms, peppers, or any other veggie you’ve got around,
  • optional–ground turkey or meat
  1. Boil noodles according to package directions.
  2. Start with a layer of noodles.  Cover noodles with thinly sliced tomatoes.  Sprinkle with salt.
  3. Cover tomatoes with spinach, dollop entire layer with sauce (to taste) then sprinkle with cheese, (also to taste.)
  4. Layer with noodles, repeat.  I usually do a different veggie on each layer, ending with noodles and topped with cheese.
  5. Bake at 350°for about 30 minutes, or until cheese on top is bubbly and inside is piping hot.

No control, part 2

daphne on February 17, 2009

I know, I’ve already admitted that there are some flaws in my logic: feeding the kids healthy foods and making them schlep groceries home in reusable bags does not in fact create an impenetrable force field around them.  It does not insulate them in a bubble of eternal health.  It does not encircle their precious bodies with impervious walls of steel.

I know this.  At some level, I do know this.  But in the abyss of the powerless it is these little things that I cling to in a pathetic grasp for control.  It’s these little things that make me feel like I am the queen of all I survey.  Like I can control the destinies of those who rely on me.  It’s the little things, like, for example, a helmet.

On a recent quest for mother-of-the-year, I passed on my usual ‘let’s just hang out at home’ routine, picked the girls up from school and took them ice skating.  We had this interchange on the way to the car:

Kira: I thought you said 8 year-olds didn’t have to wear helmets?

This is true. I did let her go sans helmet at her birthday party, which was at the very same ice skating rink-o-trauma. It didn’t seem that scary last month at the party–

I thought for a mili-second, then came up with this in response:

OK, if you are not planning on skating backwards, or skating fast, then yes, you can skip the helmet.

I don’t know how I came up with these parameters, but somehow in my world, birthdays, slow-skating, and going forward offer all the protection a kid could need.

Kira, with haughty eyes and exasperation:  Fine. I’ll wear the helmet, Mom.

And so it was that Kira wore her helmet.

And when she fell backwards that helmet went down with her. That helmet hit the ice, hard enough to give her a concussion.  For those of you playing at home, that makes two sisters, three concussions, eight years. And just to keep things really exciting, Kira, like her sister, falls into that tiny percentage of people who get concussion-related seizures.

She is, thankfully, fine.  She will be totally fine.

Me? I’m fine too. Really I am.  It’s just that if you need me, I’ll be in the corner, replaying vividly horrible images and rocking uncontrollably.

And mourning my complete lack of control.

There’s nothing like cinnamon in the morning

daphne on February 11, 2009

My kitchen smells amazing.   Unbelievably incredibly amazing.  And I’ll tell you, I don’t typically waste superlatives on things that don’t include chocolate.  In the interest of full disclosure, though, I probably should mention that I am writing this before my first attempt at homemade granola is ready for a taste test; at least this way I can carry on and on about the scrumptious smell even if the resulting snack comes out less edible than my exploding glass bread.

I’ve never made granola before, but the price of the stuff I buy at the store keeps climbing like an Ever-ready Sherpa.  And to hear my friends tell it, this stuff is even easier to make than pancakes from scratch.  So far, I’m a believer; I mixed up a batch in the time it took the girls to brush their teeth this morning.

Ten minutes to go according to the timer, and my house smells terrific. Forget lemon-scented cleansers, I may never clean again.  Close your eyes…could a house that smells this heavenly be dirty? I just don’t think so.

Speaking of smells, according to some new research pleasant odors, like peppermint or cinnamon, can increase alertness and reduce fatigue.  And, they found, it might even help with road rage.  I’m just saying, if you need a reason to mix up a batch of granola, think of your reputation:  you could be the most pleasant car-pooler out there.  Even without a mini-van.  And speaking of minivans, cinnamon is a powerful aphrodisiac too.  And it costs a mere fraction of the pricetag of a new car.

Therefore, in conclusion, here is is. . . My list of convincing reasons why you should stop everything and make  granola:

  1. These are tough economic times, homemade is cheaper.
  2. The sweet smell of cinnamon means an end to boring house cleaning.
  3. The sweet smell of cinnamon is the right spice for heating up a marriage.
  4. It’ll make you perky, alert, and happy behind the wheel.
  5. You can hide healthy stuff in there, like flax seeds
  6. You can hide healthy stuff in there, And THE KIDS WILL EAT IT.
  7. THE NUMBER ONE REASON TO MAKE GRANOLA (listed here at number 7)–it tastes really, really good.
  8. Really, it does.  I just tasted my first attempt at homemade granola.  And it is good.

Homemade Granola

daphne on February 11, 2009

This is the recipe that I cobbled together from a few sources.  Based on my wholly unscientific research, I found that the recipe is extremely forgiving.  Use what you’ve got in the kitchen. The kids will eat it.

  • 1/3 – 1/2 cup honey
  • ¼ cup maple syrup
  • 1/3 cup canola oil
  • 2 Tbls water
  • ½ teaspoon vanilla extract
  • ½ teaspoon cinnamon
  • ¼ teaspoon salt
  • 4 cups of rolled oats
  • 1/4 cup of ground flax seeds
  • ¾ cup chopped pecans (or any other nut)
  • ¾ cup shredded coconut (unsweetened if you can find it. I couldn’t.)
  • 1 cup dried cranberries, raisins, or any other fruit combo.

Preheat oven to 350°.  Butter or spray a baking sheet.

Mix the first 7 ingredients together, and set aside.

Combine the dry ingredients—except for the dried fruit–in a large bowl, and add wet ingredients. Mix until everything is coated.

Spread the mixture on the baking sheet. Bake about 30 minutes, stirring once or twice, until the granola is golden brown.

After baking, add the fruit.  Cool, and store in jars or Tupperware.

My favorite way to eat it is over plain yogurt and drizzled with a little more honey.  But then, I like things sweet.

It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s…Super-Flax!

daphne on February 11, 2009

You should add flax to everything.

Not convinced? Oh, alright.  If you don’t want to save time and just take my word for it, here are some of the reasons why I think flax is great:

  1. It adds moisture to things like cakes, muffins, and quick breads. You can decrease the oil in recipes by substitute ground flax;
  2. It adds a great nutty flavor to things;
  3. A subtly, great nutty flavor that picky children don’t detect;
  4. It’s easy to hide–sprinkle ground flax seeds on everything from yogurt to ice cream, in granola or on peanut butter sandwiches;

And there’s a load of health benefits too:

  1. It’s high in omega 3 fatty acids, which have been found to benefit everything from the heart to lowering cholesterol to increasing brain power.  All good things.
  2. High in lignans, antioxidants associated with a reduced risk of cancer, including prostrate and breast cancer.
  3. It’s been found to lower bad cholesterol and blood pressure;
  4. It’s high in fiber;
  5. It’s been shown to be helpful in reducing incidences related to Chron’s disease;