Quoth the Husband, Nevermore
Thank you, Edgar Allen Poe, for graciously lending me the format and rhyme of your beloved The Raven to summarize the following scene of suburban pumpkin mayhem.
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Once upon a weeknight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary,
Over a large and snowy cluster of shriveled gourds;
I determined I’d be napping, when from the kitchen I heard tapping
‘Twas my husband, strangely, tap-tap-tapping.
With a knife, he was apparently not down with napping.
He had the pumpkins on the floor.
Ah, distinctly I remember, saying No, let’s not dismember,
The pumpkins though true, the flesh puckers in with mush.
Gently I urged the task forgotten, put off a day; I was down-trodden
And there was laundry to be gotten, yet the knife began to slash.
The madman muttered softly, and with his knife began to slash
And I? I intercepted flesh aimed for the trash.
Inevitably the task grew longer, his resolve did not grow stronger;
`Wife,’ said he, `Help, for your assistance I implore;
The fact is I was trying, a plan to expedite the drying,
Perhaps they need a’fryin’? And he grinned, amongst the seeds there on the floor.
I took in the grisly score, gourd flesh stuck to ceiling and to floor.
My eyes flashed darkness, nothing more.
Though I said that I was weary, the seeds were out and oh so smeary
Pumpkin guts piled high into the night
I shook my head, recipe reciting, rocking slightly to keep from fighting
Like an angel softly igniting, I opened up the oven door.
‘In they go,’ said I, pointing tired spouse towards oven door.
Quoth my husband, Nevermore
9 Replies to “Quoth the Husband, Nevermore”
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LOVED IT!!! That was a blast!
FANTASTIC! I loved this one – you’re so talented!
Great poem/post 🙂 Happy Halloween!
That was great! Gets me in the mood for Halloween!
You are quite the talent girl!
You are incredibly creative!
Great post! You are such a good writer.
You are not only a great mom and wife. You are quite a poet and did not even know it. You are always making me laugh.
I don’t remember posting a comment on your roasting
your tired spouse behind that oven door
Any wonder that he quoteth Nevermore!
And I will do some writhing if you have done some knifeing
of my name from off your oven door
I do remember liking every thing that you’ve been writing
And should not be relegated to the state of Nevermore!
Enough–want to apologize for kind of disappearing for the last few days or maybe weeks–have no excuses, just think I have been multitasking–having weekend guests, taking part in the coop election, getting involved with ? and neglected my computer. But I have missed so much
of your great writings and it will take time to catch up. But I thought you had crossed me off–please don’t do that. Glad you had a wonderful Thanksgiving and looking forward to the regular holiday.