Can you tell me how to get, how to get . . .

Now that we all know where baby frogs come from, it’s time to move on.  I know that once upon a time I got my head all wrapped up in the business of making baby squash, but that too is old news.  Next up on the madcap quest to uncover all the secrets of reproduction?  Could you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street?

Wait, no! Not the guys from Sesame Street. I certainly don’t want Ernie doling out the ABCs of S.E.X.  And really, I’m just looking for the low-down on sesame seeds.  Anyone out there heard of a sesame tree?  Do those little guys grow right on the bagels? I need help!  Could you tell me how they get, how they get those sesame seeds?

Once again my children have managed to elucidate the gaping holes in my education.  Simply by asking a question.  For argument’s sake let’s even say it’s an innocent question, one designed to extract information and not, oh I don’t know, intent on proving once again that mommy knows absolutely nothing and who on earth thought she was qualified to raise future citizens of this world?

The coffee was still percolating, but the bagels, encrusted with toasty sesame seeds, sat on the table,  causing Acadia’s thoughts to turn to mining the remaining mysteries of her world.

Acadia, “Mom? Where do sesame seeds come from?”

My answer, “You know, they fall off the bagels,” didn’t make the cut.

Nor did Kira’s answer. “Sunflowers, duh.”

Nor did Dave’s answer, “Sesame Street, duh.”

You know, that cute little shop down on the lower East side. Hoopers, I think it’s called? The one with the incredible smells that unfurl and wrap even Oscar’s trash can in its fresh-baked aromas.

Acadia was not amused.

And as PBS was the electronic parenting tool of the 1970s, so google is the trusty crutch of parenting these days.

Just a few seconds on the laptop turned up this, the elusive sesame plant,

growing not on Sesame St. as previously thought, but in tropical regions around the world. It was first domesticated in India, and is found throughout Asia and Africa.  Hey, this is fun!  Come on! Let’s learn more about this secretive seed…

You’re sure to be hit at your next cocktail party, just casually drop one of these nuggets into conversation and watch your friends be wowed:

• The sesame seed is the first recorded seasoning in history, dating back as far as 3,000 B.C.
• It didn’t actually say this anywhere, but I’ll bet there are some killer recipes etched beneath the dead mammoths and the stick figure guys with arrows on some cave walls over there.
• The sesame plant is official known as Sesamum Indicum, and can reach 6 feet high. I know. It’s amazing.
• Ever wonder where that super cool saying “open sesame” came from? Unconfirmed rumors (hello fact-checking?) say that the mature sesame seed pod splits open with such an impressive pop, that people everywhere spontaneously took up with the catchy phrase. Just something to ponder as you try to get baby to open his mouth for another tasty spoon of pureed peas.

• Category: Earth
• Tag: open sesame, sesame seed, sesame seeds, sesame street