The Celery is Coming, The Celery is Coming
Run for your lives!
Yes, I know that there’s plenty to be scared of these days. Is it irresponsible for me to heap insult atop the terrifying fear that grips so many of us regarding the very future of our families, our country, our whole suffering planet? Sorry, I’m just telling it like I see it. And frankly, if you’re not already a little jittery around veggies, this is the stuff of nightmares. After years of playing second fiddle to the ever-popular carrot, celery has gone mad.
Following our final CSA delivery, Kira got a little too close, drawn in no doubt by the frilly fronds of this 30 lb menace. No worries, my parenting instincts kicked in, and I knocked the monster to the floor, protecting my darling daughter from the green hulk.
Seriously. That’s celery. And at no more than half a dozen months old, it’s practically engulfing my seven year old. What on earth has it been eating?
If you look closely you can see the anxiety behind Kira’s smile/grimace. No doubt she’s thinking that if the vegetables have been breeding for superior size trouble is close at hand. Think of the poor poor chocolates. What chance does a mere cookie hold against greens bent on global domination?
What’s that? Have I gone too far? Too much on your plate these days to increase your worry to include our imminent demise by celery? OK, I can see that. Perhaps I should be doing my part to ease the pre-election pressure. How about this? I’m sure you’ll agree that it’s been way too long since my last Gratuitous Picture of a Cow. I love the cows.
Meet Bessie, a proud milker-to-be. I met her on the Kindergarten Pumpkin Patch field trip which I found informative and interesting. (Acadia’s take: no snacks=no fun.) At one year, Bessie is serenely awaiting her bovine prince charming, who will arrive in the form of artificial insemination. After the romance has cleared, Bessie will be ready for a lifetime of providing milk to happy little children. Thanks, Bess.
5 Replies to “The Celery is Coming, The Celery is Coming”
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You will need a HUGE bucket of peanut butter for all that celery!
I love hearing about you CSA, I loved our CSA! When we moved we had to give our CSA to a family member and we have not started a new one. I loved figuring what it was and what do do with all the wonderful veggies!
Celery that size makes me think of Bunnicula. It’s just made for a vegitarian vampire!
I love the pictures!
I agree with Amy – you are going to need a lot of peanut butter for that celery! Great post. 🙂
REally – if you feed the children they to will grow tall and ?stalky?